Still learning

I’m still learning how to do life as a bit of a weird person. 

Sometimes things might seem odd or out of place and I think you just have to be content to not know why they ARE out of place or to understand that you might think they’re out of place when they’re actually not at all. 

Back to actions and not words. Take direction from the real things and not from the weird feeling I might get from some slightly out of place moment or from the absence of something not vital. 
I put everything under too much pressure. I need to sit back and enjoy it happening rather than scrutinise every aspect of my life and feel rubbish if I think I’m not doing it right. 

Need to relax into life and it’s pace. 

Doggo Day

I thought this might be a good time to write a little bit about how much i enjoying taking these roughians out for a walk every few days! 

I think about my past BAEs a lot all the time but international dog day makes me think of Lola. She was my dream dog and I really felt she engaged with us and we were a team. She worshipped my dad and he did his best by her and kept up the Boss / Pup structure whilst still providing her with a loving home. 

I Knew where I stood with her and that’s really comfortable position to be in with a strong wolf descendant with a locking jaw. 

These guys are not mine and are relatively new to me but I’ve been enjoying seeing our little bond develop and how they’ve began to trust me and I have began to trust that they’ll come back to me even if I don’t call them. 

It frustrates me that there are people who own dogs and who don’t think they have the time to walk them but when I ask they say they are not really doing anything today. I know it’s all relative and everyone has their own struggles but these pups are members of a family and they love the people that spend time with them and walk them. 

I’m not complaining though because it means that I get to walk them and see them having a wild time running through forests and pretending they’ve got a hope of catching someone that doesn’t have myxomatosis or isn’t already on its way out. 

I’m still looking forward to a time when my partner and I can adopt a pupper to a our team but I feel more settled in that it has to be when the life we can provide for that animal is the ideal one and isn’t compromised by our work, travel or any other adventure we might I be ourselves on. 

I’m a dog person but I want what’s best for the animal even if it means sacrificing some pup cuddles in the meantime. 

I’m slightly concerned with my body today. 

My last set of shifts were tough and I didn’t eat properly, admittedly. But it’s behaving strangely in a few odd areas. 

I’m just hoping everything is still working the way it should and a good nights sleep will resolve these strange little feelings.